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I do not love him

University graduation just 23 years old from hebei I journey to jinan to look for a job.male enhancement Just to jinan, I can’t find work, a lonely girl, walked around in the streets and lanes, the tree leaves pieces of floating down, almost drown my hope of based on.

Even without friends, lonely sadness, all natural male enhancement I have no intention of giving it up. Suffered many days, after a month I found work in a company. Although only 1200 yuan a month, male enhancement reviews but I have been very satisfied.

The colleagues of the company HeFeng, than I am seven years old, look at me, I’m far from home is a little girl, I took care of. HeFeng will be a room of his house lease to me, each month to charge me $100 symbolic rent, I can’t thank you enough. Every day, we are going to work together, like a couple. Are fond of I, gets confused to live together with him. Everyone said HeFeng is a good man, I also admit. HeFeng very good, I can only say so, but from start to later, I do not love him.

I decided to marry HeFeng, just because I want to stay in jinan, he is in the city I can only take refuge in person. Seem to have more choices, and in June, 2006, we brought the marriage certificate.

Married life is full of light. Then my husband and I and HeFengSheng down the lovely daughter, I love my daughter, and nurturing she grew up day by day, hope she’ll have ambition.

Due to the busy husband all day to earn money, our time together little little, so communication and the opportunity to exchange also is very little. Time is long, the more I feel life away just like the plain boiled water as no taste, I was very disappointed.

In January, 2009, I came to a hotel to work. This work and contact with frequent, sweep I ever of life lonesome. Do hotel management, every day I can see new faces, I enjoy the eyes of attention. Especially male colleagues. Even younger than me eight years old male subordinate RenJun (a pseudonym) occasionally kua I a beautiful, also can let me heartache.

RenJun from May 2009 began to enter my horizons. He secretly initiative called my elder sister, cried my in the mind has a say a wonderful. I may have intended to attract him, I always deliberately create opportunities with him, for example, let him learn a lot from I make collective report work, also go off work time. For example, the colleague dinner or go out to play, I’ll sit with him or to the same group. An resist, I was RenJun handsome appearance attractive. His eyes clear, and the handsome face, body sends out out a stream of youth, the breath of the sun.

In October 2010, in a birthday party colleagues after, RenJunFa messages to me: “elder sister, don’t I send to you?” In under the nose of others, we are feeling in the message? I return to him a bunch of ellipsis: “……”

They dispersed, RenJun stand in the corner, he is silently waiting for me. I went to his side, he pulled up my hand, I not the slightest flabbergasted. Although our relationship is short, although we just quietly drive ambiguity of the joke.

RenJun lift me up to a at a hotel, I was wide awake: “you not to send me home?” He said: “drink many, go up rest.” I also seems to drink many, like a puppet, and he has entered the room… I didn’t have the courage to face it all, I don’t like the little boy, when they are very young don’t like. But this time I don’t really know why, his arms I kiss me, I had a rapture……

RenJun are shanxi people, he sunshine, really, enthusiasm, also very sensible. Had that night, he has become very sticky I. I did not speak of my family status, he didn’t know I married, also don’t know my age. I maintain better, looks very young, looks like 2045 years old.

RenJun invite I go out to play, in the daming lake edge, he hold me, fancy imagination: “in the future if we got married, to find the most beautiful places on their honeymoon! No word of money, I went to borrow, also want to make you happy. Marry the sister such wife, I still have what not meet? Chens love to have what not good, when you are old, I take care of you, and held your hand as you walked and watch the sunset……” I was moved by his words, so more have the courage to tell him I’m a woman of the home.

RenJun everywhere please me, he said I was his first love, “the first love is the life is the most beautiful feelings, devoted her all, go to town, heart and soul.” He is like a fire, was I, burning I.

I’m very afraid of the relationship will because the truth and die young. A home have children of woman, want to cover themselves married facts is very hard. Fortunately, I and RenJun of be in love belongs to the action, I to the tone of the boss told him: “not in the public and I laugh, not in the unit leak our relationship, is no good. If you do not, we break up, it’s not open for discussion.” “When can the public?” RenJun a face of innocence, “are you have what matter not telling me.” “Don’t you want for me?” My face don’t change color, “I am your leadership, there is nothing happens, the first one I will hurt.” I fear of injury, because I have been deeply love handsome took office, if he knew my secret, then abandoned me, that I do? He can accept the fact that I married? He told me they said to love me for my whole life, that is he thought I was single? But not to reveal the truth, I was cheating on him, and I was really contradiction…

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